"Keep your kidneys healthy, mama's"

I spent the weekend in the hospital. I went into the ER on Friday night (in the middle of a major snow storm) and didn't get back from the hospital until Sunday. I had a major kidney infection. It was incredibly painful and scary and I will push a baby out any day compared the whole kidney business.

Now I sit alone in my house under my granny square blanket. Not the one actually made by my grandmother, but it reminds me of her just the same. I'm watching the snow perform ballet, as it falls from the sky. Slow, soft. The kind of rhythm that my life needs right now to recover.

My three children are farmed out to relatives and friends and I miss them dearly although I know I can't care for them. And five minutes of the noise might drive me to insanity. My inability to care for them became all too clear last night. Anne (6) and I were practicing her reading on the couch and Beth (19 months) crawled onto my lap for a cuddle. Approximately five seconds later she puked all over her sickly mother. I immediately yelled, "Baby throwing up on sick mama, help!" to my sister-in-law, who came to my aid.

It was the motivation I needed to get in the shower that day.

Friends have flooded the fridge with food and delivered flowers. I feel loved and lonely at the same time. My house is empty. I'm sitting here wondering about what my children are doing and who they are playing with...and my heart fills with gratitude.

Not only that I have someone to watch my children. But that I have a beloved aunt, parents and close friends who will deeply care for my children as their own... when I cannot. I am so thankful that the relationships between those special adults and my children were nurtured and have grown in a such a healthy way that my kids have no problem going to "so and so's" house to spend the night. It feels (for the most part) an effortless transition for them to be under the watch and care of someone they love and admire.

I guess I could feel sorry for myself that they "don't miss me enough." But I know that's foolish. Instead I'm proud of their confidence and their willingness to trust another.

I am so practically reminded of that this how the Body of Christ was designed to operate. When one part is weak, the other makes up the difference. Or in my case, when one kidney falters, another one steps up the plate.

"If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." 1 Corinthians 12:26-27

As Matt was driving Anne home last night, she confided in him, "You know...I am really sad that Mommy is so sick. (pause) But it sure is fun for me because I get to have so many sleepovers."

Hopefully, in a couple of weeks I will get to be the stronger part of the body again. I will get to nurture another's child, prepare a meal or bring some flowers of cheer.

Until then, keep your kidneys healthy, mamas. Go drink a glass of water.